Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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