Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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