after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
All the doctor said was why
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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