Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
