so that wasnt chicken after all
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
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He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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