If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
