Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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