remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize