great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
