idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
