Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize