Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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