new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
