i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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