I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
