Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
