No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
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