I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize
