we have pet lesbian snakes
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
