I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
foreskin is a definite game changer
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I think people are normalizing furries
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
