Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
