That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
