apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
She's the barista slut.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
