false alarm. still invincible.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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