Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
