your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
