google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
