1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
