Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
