do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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