We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
