for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
