Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
