are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
