Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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