I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
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No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
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She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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