You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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