I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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