If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
