You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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