Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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