I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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