New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You're breaking my sexual little heart
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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