HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
