dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
