Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We need to get me chipped asap
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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