he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
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