Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
someone owes me an orgasm
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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