hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
