If that was your dad, he is hot
from now on my penis is your penis
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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